Here is a selection of the latest Q and A's
Q: Dear Lola,
Lately I have been feeling depressed. My mom and dad are never
around and when they are they are always fighting. My grades have
been dropping from all A's to all D's. I need some help to get
my life back on track. Please help. I'm close to the point where
I want to quit school. please help,
scared and lonely
A: Dear scared and lonely,
It certainly is no fun being caught up in the middle of family
problems. Ithink you can play pivotal role in helping the situation,
but you first have to get rid of any depressive tendencies, because
these will only hinder you from being of service to your mom and
dad. Do whatever you can to serve your parents and to share a
happy, light-hearted spirit with them when you are around them.
If you foster love in the home by the way you act and the attitude
that you possess, they will feel the spirit of this love, and
hopefully your mom and dad will turn those feelings of love towards
My friend copies my homework and cheats off my paper all the time.She
is getting credit off of what I do. She also has a really big
mouth and talks bad about me. I don't want to be friends with
her but I don't want to be mean. What should I say to end the
friendship but to not make her cry????!!!
A:I think you need to have a heart to heart with her and
tell her that you don't feel comfortable with her cheating off
of you. Her actions are not only making her a dishonest person,
but they're making you dishonest as well. Tell her that you would
feel better about things if you didn't share your work any more.
Surely she will know that what you are saying is true and she'll
realize that what she has been doing is completely dishonest.
Though this may offend her, at least you will be standing up for
what you know is right. This in and of itself may bring the friendship
to a natural close. You could probably just start phasing out
the friendship slowly by spending less time with her and doing
things with others.
Q: Dear Lola,
When I was in the ninth grade, I met a girl that I really liked
and she felt the same way. Well, sooner or later we ended up getting
together and from then on we really just fell in love with each
other and were basically inseparable. Anyway we were together
for a year and 2 months and then for some reason we just broke
it off--it was one of those mutual break ups. To be totally honest
with you the break up killed me. I mean it tore me up. Then at
the beginning of this year we kind of found that old flame again
and got back together and now its like everything is great again.
I mean we couldn't e happier. I guess what my question is this--
Is it possible for someone of our age (16) to really be in love
with someone else? How do I know or will I know for sure if she
is the right one? What do you think?
A: I think that what you are feeling may be the beginning
of a wonderful relationship of love, but such a relationship does
not come easily. Relationships that are based on true love require
years of nurturing and caring, and these relationships cannot
survive unless both individuals involved are willing to sacrifice
whatever is necessary in order to facilitate the happiness of
the other person. Many people your age get into little relationships
that are loaded with infatuation, and think they are in love.
But this is never the case. True love is sacred and unique, and
when you experience even a little piece of it, you will know.
I think you are catching a glimpse of it now, but remember how
much more still lies ahead.