It wasn't Nella's fault she was born unattractive. It wasn't even
Mother and Father's fault. It was no one's fault. Nella was only
fifteen and after fifteen years of being looked down upon, she felt
thrity and she couldn't take one more year.

"God, please. I beg for forgiveness for what I am about to do" Nella
whispered as she looked out of her attic window.

It was a breezy day. A breeze that easily made eucalyptus leaves
rustle. It was even more breezy on the roof of Nella's house and she
felt her stomach tighten when she felt the potential power of the wind
to blow her right off. But she wasn't planning on falling. The height
of the roof offered a broken leg, if fallen off of. But if dove off of,
it promised, it swore, a broken neck and death. Nella planned on diving
off.

What a horrible tragedy. An unnecessary death. It's not understandable, the logic behind it. But that's exactly it. There is no logic behind it. A fifteen year old homely girl, tormented every remembered day of her short yet doomed life, will dive off the roof of her house to spare her broken, unrepairable heart another hateful day of shallowness and ignorance. It boggles the mind.

"God, forgive me." The whisper escaped Nella's dry lips and floated
away with the wind. She thought of her life, the sum of her days on the
planet. It all added up to one longing: to be a Johanson.

The view from the roof allowed a better view of the house across the
street. The sweet little girl laying on the lawn on her tiny back. The
Gilmores didn't have a lawn. They had dirt. The Johanson house itself
spoke of cherished moments of a priviliged life. Though not rich, the
Johansons were well off. They had some luxuries that the Gilmore's
couldn't afford. A nice wooden fence to surround the yard, trees to
shade the white house. The sun wasn't shaded from the morosely grey
house of the Gilmore's.

Curtains hung in all the windows at the Johanson's; lace curtains. Sheets, old, unmatching sheets with gaudy boquets of faded flowers hung over some windows at the Gilmore's. But why? Nella wondered. Well, because we can't afford anything else. But why? Well, because Father doesn't make enough money. But why? Because Father is depressed and can't keep a steady job. Daddy Johanson went to college, Father didn't.

"God, I just want to be free." thought Nella. Free to choose her
friends, not long for just one. Aislinn Johanson knows enough people to
choose her friends and enemies from. Nella only has enemies.

Ignorance. Failure to see deeper, it plagued her from birth. Failure
to see past a face and a family of unsightly siblings and unbecoming
parents pulled Nella closer to the center of the Earth faster than
gravity ever could.